Filed under: Teh Penguin
So I typed a lovely post about 10 minutes ago and saved it and I can’t find it anymore.
Maybe it wasn´t that good and WordPress might have a secret screening process.
Anywho…I was just telling you guys that I have a long and tough day ahead of me…who signs up for a marathon in Icleand? I have lived here for 10 years, one should think I knew the temperament of our climate. But it is for a good cause and I don´t like to chicken out on stuff last minute. So I´ll be limping after all the ladies pushing prams, trying not to put too much pressure on my foot while the rain will beat down on me. The wind might carry me some of the way though. Always a silver lining!
I needed a bit if cheering me up, and I love bad puns. I really do! As snarksters go, I am easily amused, so I truly hope this works for you as well!
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
He sold his soul to Santa
Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?
He’s all right now.
Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?
He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.
How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.
How do you get holy water?
Boil the hell out of it.
How does a spoiled rich girl change a lightbulb?
She says, “Daddy, I want a new apartment.”
What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall?
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
What do prisoners use to call each other?
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work?
What do you call Santa’s helpers?
What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?
What do you get from a pampered cow?
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic?
and what kind of lettuce?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef.
Why do bagpipers walk when they play?
They’re trying to get away from the noise.
See? Stupid Easily amused!
I wish all you guys a wonderful weekend, safe returns for myself of course and feel free to leave punny lines in the comment section, I do love them!
Subordinate clauses made me spill some coffee 🙂
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