Central Snark


Garry Mimble by Snuppy
Wednesday, 20 December 2006, 9:25am
Filed under: holidays, music music

LET’S take a festively fab sleigh ride back to 1963, shall we? To a time just before THE BEATLES came to America, started their musical revolution, and changed the way we thought about the rest of the world — or realized there even was a “rest of the world”, especially where music was concerned.

THE Fab Four’s first Christmas Record came out a few months before they hit it big in the United States — produced, we imagine, for the pure enjoyment of their fans abroad (where they happened to live, which was convenient). Lucky fans. We think it’s a hoot, and we hope you’ll agree. Of course, for the sake of a post — seeing as how we’ve yet to complete any of our holiday preparations and are now in full red-alert-panic-in-the-streets mode —  we don’t care if you think it sucks. We can’t be hanging around here all day, holding your hands because you don’t “love” The Beatles the way we did and/or do.

DON’T freak out by the size of this post (DOUG & AL have worked so hard to help us understand why “size doesn’t matter”, this might be a good time to take their words to heart). Anyway, this only looks long (and scary) because we’ve listed the lyrics below, in case you can’t hear the audio (PIA?) and/or you’d like to follow along, since the “video”, tho’ fun to watch, is really little more than early-yet-gear pictures of John, Paul, George and Ringo.

OH YEAH. Before we start this “show”, can someone please find our dear Pez Pal, AP3? ‘Cuz, unless we miss our guess, she’s gonna want to see this.

(The following is a word for word transcript from this mimbly holiday record… we promise it’s not necessary to read. In our woefully delusional minds, we thought listening might be more fun if you knew what was being said.)

The Beatles Christmas Record — 1963 

HO!
GOOD KING WENCELAS LAST LOOKED OUT
ON THE FEAST OF STEPHEN, HO!
AS THE SLOW RAY ROUND ABOUT
DEEP AND CRISP AND CRISPY.
BRIGHTLY SHOW THE BOOT LAST NIGHT
ON THE MOSSTY CRUEL.
HENRY HALL AND DAVID LLOYD,
BETTY GRABLE TOO-OO-OO.

HELLO, THIS IS JOHN, SPEAKING WITH HIS VOICE. (huh!)
WE’RE ALL VERY HAPPY TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO YOU LIKE THIS ON THIS LITTLE BIT OF PLASTIC. THIS RECORD REACHES YOU AT THE END OF A REALLY GEAR YEAR FOR US AND IT’S ALL DUE TO YOU.

WHEN WE MADE OUR FIRST RECORD ON PARLOPHONE TOWARDS THE END OF 1962, WE HOPED EVERYBODY WOULD LIKE WHAT HAD ALREADY BEEN OUR TYPE OF MUSIC FOR SEVERAL YEARS ALREADY. BUT WE HAD NO IDEA OF ALL THE GEAR THINGS IN STORE FOR US. IT ALL HAPPENED REALLY WHEN ‘PLEASE PLEASE ME’ BECAME A NUMBER ONE HIT. AND AFTER THAT, WELL, COR’ THE BLIMEYS, HEAVE THE MO’.

OUR BIGGEST THRILL OF THE YEAR, WELL, I SUPPOSE IT MUST HAVE BEEN TOPPING THE BILL AT THE LONDON PALLADIUM AND THEN, ONLY A COUPLE OF DAYS LATER, BEING INVITED TO TAKE PART IN THE ROYAL VARIETY SHOW. (whistles “God Save the Queen”) THIS TIME LAST YEAR WE WERE ALL DEAD CHUFFED BECAUSE ‘LOVE ME DO’ GOT INTO THE TOP TWENTY AND WE CAN’T BELIEVE REALLY THAT SO MANY THINGS HAVE HAPPENED IN BETWEEN ALREADY.

JUST BEFORE I PASS YOU OVER TO PAUL, (arf! arf! arf! arf!) I’D LIKE TO SAY THANK YOU TO ALL THE BEATLE PEOPLE WHO HAVE WRITTEN TO ME DURING THE YEAR AND EVERYONE WHO SENT ME GIFTS AND CARDS FOR MY BIRTHDAY, WHICH I’M TRYING TO FORGET, IN OCTOBER. (huh!) I’D LOVE TO REPLY PERSONALLY TO EVERYONE BUT I JUST HAVEN’T ENOUGH PENS. IN THE MEANTIME:

GARRY CRIMBLE TO YOU,
GARRY MIMBLE TO YOU.
GETTY BABLE, DEAR CHRISTMAS,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ME TOO.

THIS IS PAUL HERE.
EVERYTHING THAT JOHN SAID GOES FOR ME TOO, SPECIALLY THE BIT ABOUT BIRTHDAY CARDS AND TH’ PARCELS, ‘CAUSE ALL OUR HOMES AND OFFICES GOT STACKS OF MAIL LAST JUNE, OW! HA-HA! WHEN IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY. ANYWAY, WE’RE ALL DEAD PLEASED BY THE WAY YOU TREATED US IN 1963, AND WE TRY TO DO EVERYTHING WE CAN TO PLEASE YOU, WITH THE TYPE OF SONGS WE’LL WRITE AND RECORD NEXT YEAR.

OH YEAH, SOMEBODY ASKED US IF WE STILL LIKE JELLY BABIES? WELL, WE USED TO LIKE THEM, IN FACT WE LOVED THEM, AND SAID SO IN ONE OF THE PAPERS, YOU SEE. EVER SINCE THEN WE’VE BEEN GETTIN’ THEM IN BOXES, PACKETS AND CRATES. ANYWAY, WE’VE GONE RIGHT OFF JELLY BABIES, YOU SEE, BUT WE STILL LIKE PEPPERMINT CREAMS, CHOCOLATE DROPS AND DOLLY MIXTURES AND ALL THAT SORT OF THINGS. (Yes! Yes! Oh yes!)

WELL, LOTS OF PEOPLE ASKED US WHAT WE ENJOY BEST, YOU SEE, CONCERTS AND TELEVISION OR RECORDING? WE LIKE DOING STAGE SHOWS ‘CAUSE IT’S, YOU KNOW, IT’S GREAT TO HEAR AN AUDIENCE ENJOYING THEMSELVES. BUT THE THING WE LIKE BEST, I THINK SO ANYWAY, IS GOING INTO THE RECORDING STUDIO (Yes, we enjoy that very kindly) TO MAKE NEW RECORDS, WHICH IS WHAT WE’VE BEEN DOING ALL DAY BEFORE WE STARTED ON THIS SPECIAL MESSAGE.

WELL, WHAT WE LIKE TO HEAR MOST IS ONE OF OUR SONGS, YOU KNOW, TAKING SHAPE IN A RECORDING STUDIO, AH, ONE OF THE ONES JOHN AND I HAVE WRITTEN — AND THEN LISTENING TO THE TAPES AFTERWARDS TO HEAR HOW IT ALL WORKED OUT, YOU SEE. WELL, I’M RUNNING OUT OF MY TIME AND PEOPLE ARE TELLING ME TO STOP, (Stop! Stop!) AND RINGO, (Stop! Stop! Shouting those animals!) SO…I’LL FINISH OFF NOW WITH IT WISHING EVERYONE HAPPY CRIMBLE AND A MERRY NEW YEAR AND ESPECIALLY ALL THE ONES WHO PAID THE SUBSCRIPTION.

JA, DAS WIRD UNS DANKE SCHON
UND DENN GRUSS VON EVEN.
JA, DENN GRUSS VON EVEN SCHON
JA, DAS WIRD WUNDERSCHON, BOY,
DANKE SCHON.

JA, RINGO!

HELLO, RINGO HERE,
AS YOU KNOW I WAS THE LAST MEMBER TO JOIN THE BEATLES. I STARTED TO PLAY DRUMS IN THE GROUP 1962, HA-HA-HA! HAVE BEEN IN A COUPLE OF OTHER GROUPS…(Oh, just wish the people a merry, happy, go on, for Christmas, Christmas) MERRY, HAPPY NEW YEAR, AND FOLKS, HAPPY CHRISTMAS AND MAY, MAY EVERYTHING YOU WISH BE GRANTED. (Sing, sing us Wenceslas, King Wenceslas) KING WENCESLAS:

WELL, GOOD KING WENCESLAS LAST LOOKED DOWN (oh ho!)
ON THE FEAST OF STEPHEN. (hey!)
WHEN THE SNOW WAS ON THE GROUND, (yeah!)
DEEP AND CRISP AND EVEN. (oh yeah!)

HOORAY!!

THANK YOU, RINGO! THANK YOU, RINGO! WE’LL PHONE YOU! (ha ha ha!)
I’M GEORGE HARRISON,

NOBODY ELSE SAID ANYTHING YET ABOUT OUR FAN CLUB SECRETARIES, ANN COLLINGHAM AND BETTINA ROSE, NOT TO MENTION FREDA KELLY IN LIVERPOOL. (Good old Freda!!) SO ON BEHALF OF US ALL, I’D JUST LIKE TO SAY A GREAT, BIG THANK YOU TO ANN, BETTINA AND FREDA FOR ALL THE HARD WORK THEY’VE DONE AND WE JUST HOPE YOU CAN GO ON PLEASING US FOR A LONG TIME, CAUSE IT’S GONNA CAUSE IT TO YOUR REACTION ARE TO OUR RECORDS THAT REALLY MATTERS, AND I JUST LIKE TO SAY:

BRIGHTLY WAS THE SCHON AT NIGHT,
THOUGH THE WINTER CRUEL.
WHEN A PORK PIE CAME INSIDE
GATHERING WINTER CRUEL.

DOODAH, THE RED NOSED REINDEER (HO!)
HAD A VERY SHINY NOSE, (A SHINY NOSE!)
WHEN EVERYBODY PICKED IT…

HA, HA, HA, HA,….

OH YEAH! OH!

RUDY, THE RED NOSED RINGO, (RUDOLPH!)
HAD A VERY SHINY NOSE.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!

~snuppy

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15 Comments so far
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i know, i know… by adding in the lyrics, this post seems HUMONGOUS. if it takes too long for you all to scroll down to the comment section and/or you find yourselves developing a bad case of Carpal tunnel syndrome, let me know, and i’ll take them out and give the link to the site i found ’em on, instead. or maybe i WON’T, because, what kind of pansies are you guys, anyway? i mean, come on! you can’t put up with a little inconvenient scrolling?? (yes, i’m getting crankier by the second. so much to do… so freaking little time. aieeeeeee!) xox

Comment by One Hot Puppy

That was amazing! I’ve never heard that recording before…great find Snup!

Comment by BoBo

BoBo: i think i may have heard the very first part of it, but never the whole thing. my FAVORITE line? “Cor’ the Blimey’s and Heave the Mo'”. no idea what it means… but i plan to start using it ASAP. maybe even the next time i talk to my mom…”What? You broke your arm? Well cor’ the blimeys and heave the mo’!” yep… that works. xox

Comment by snuppy

I’ll be back later – running through on my way to a class trip. And a Beatles post no less – oh, I’ll be back allright! You’re coming up with some really good ones!!! xox

Comment by Lampy

I’ve been turning the thumbwheel on my mouse for, like, three days now, dogging my way down here to exclaim a hearty and sincere…

THANK YOU for this GREAT (if, umm, not very snarky) POST!

(I… remember… this…! I’ve passed my Alzheimer’s Test!)

Comment by Al

Wow, thats way to long for me to read. Doug and Al sound like they are girls. You should check out my site where I’m going to have lot’s of cool stuff.

Comment by Troy Van Dellen

It’s still how you use it.

Comment by Doug

Lampy: you go girl! well, actually, i guess you already did. come to think of it, by now you’re probably back. and yet… still “going”. what’s it all about, Lampy? hell if i know… hope the field trip was fun, and involved something nice, like say, cookies. 🙂 xox

Al: i believe the “snark” can be found in the second paragraph, in which we confess our lack of concern for the interest anyone may — or may not — show in this post. why? well, i, for one, am up to my eyeballs in unwrapped/unshipped gifts… designated for family members in California… aieeee! stranded in a leaky boat on my own self-created “shit creek”, and i’ll be damned if i didn’t lose the freaking paddle. holidays schmolidays… can’t wait for ’em to be over. xox

Troy Van Dellen (if that’s who you really are): so? do we add you to the blogroll/take Diesel off? keep Diesel there/add you? pretend this isn’t happening and/or ignore you until Diesel comes to his senses or the first of the year, whichever comes first? if neither comes first, will there be heavy breathing? we’re confused. oy. guess i’m just feeling verklempt because i’m kind of up to my eyeballs in… well, read my comment to Al, you’ll get the idea. xox

Comment by snuppy

Doug: use it or lose it… just don’t abuse it. 😉 xox

Comment by snuppy

I LOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVed it! I really did. And I read all the text too and am still fit as a a fiddle. Nothing like a good liverpol accent on a Wednesday night!
Thank you so much for this treat and although the entire Betales frenzy escaped me, I know why they were big and i know a ocuple of songs too. Besides, there is somethign about britishness…yummy!
I sure hope Ap3 gets a chance to check this out and oh…teh German paul is singing, a bunch of humbug 🙂

Comment by Penguin

My mom once saw George Harrison in a restaurant in London. The waiter got her his autograph… she gave it to me but with all my moves, it got lost! AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

Say Beatles to me and I will always end up kicking myself! KICK I TELL YOU!

*sigh*

I do love me the Beatles!

When in the 5th grade, I attended an “American school” in Spain that followed the British system. We had a music teacher called Mr Moonie who had us singing Beatles songs at all times… I have fond memories of “Yesterday”… FO SHO!

Snuppy de mi corazón, I applaud you, APPLAUD I SAY!

Comment by Catty Yummy Mummy

Penguin: yay!! i’m sooooo glad you liked this! and i guess you *did* miss the initial craziness that was “The Beatles”… i’ve tried to make sure my sons are well-acquainted with their music, and now that a new CD featured “enhanced” versions of their old stuff, hopefully other “young” folks will understand what all the hoopla was about (yeesh, now i feel old…). since their English is filled with humbugginess, i’m not surprised to learn Paul’s German was, too! xox

CYM: aieeeeeeeeeeee! oh my stars and soup spoons, BoheMia… you have GOT to find that piece of paper. i mean, talk about a true — not to mention priceless — bit of Beatle memorabilia. you don’t suppose it found its way into the trash in the midst of an OCD cleaning frenzy, so you? ah well, que sera, sera i suppose. as for “Yesterday”? i love that song, too… in fact, i once sang it for an audition, and got the job! (which i ultimately turned down, but still… *great song*!) as for your praise??? *blushes deeply* gracias, amiga…. xoxo

Comment by snuppy

Now that is a fabulous blast from the past – I love it! Brings back OLD, fun memories 🙂 Happy Christmas!

Comment by tsduff

First, thanks to PuppyToes for sending me over here!

Great post. I heard this recording a long, long time ago, and had certainly forgotten most of it.

Well, it was a different time, wasn’t it?

So hard to believe that these goofy young guys would be putting out Sgt. Pepper a mere four years later… crazy, isn’t it? The Beatles were nothing if not incredibly quick studies.

Funny to see how overtly commercial they were in the very beginning too. I mean, even a year later they started to shun this kinda stuff.

What an amazing — and quick — trip the Beatles took — and took everyone along with them, it seems.

Comment by AP3

Terry: so glad you were able to see/hear this! ’twas a blast from our past indeed! and a good “OLD” one at that! 😉 xox

AP3: i couldn’t let this one slip past you… and i figured you’d heard it before, but it’s still pretty cool. they sounded like typical “aspiring” stars, i think… tho’ Paul was still focused on those recording sessions (and the candy, which was funny). oh, and i thought it was sweet the way George wanted to be sure to thank the secretaries… but yeah, this kind of “rah rah” attitude didn’t last long. the price of fame, i suppose (tho’ it certainly didn’t stunt their creativity, and thank goodness for that!) xox

Comment by snuppy




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