Filed under: cracks us up
BELIEVE it or not, we intended to do the following post last week, but did not, because we were treated to a couple of happy surprise “pop-in posts” — first by the beautiful BoheMian, CYM, and then by the gorgeous gal behind the red glitter lips, LBP. As a result, we wound up tossing our own meager offering into the garbage can, since we didn’t know what else to do. Imagine our relief and/or joy to see the delightful post by our dearest NBFF, DJ LAMPSHA, over the weekend, as it provided us with the perfect impetus to pluck our pre-written Colbert-related post right out of the trash, in order to throw it up on the Snark today. And by “throw up” we mean share our words, not our puke. Tho’ you may think this is a pukey post, but then, you didn’t have to rummage through the garbage for it late at night, and who are you to judge us anyway? But, we digress. We had this post, and now we get to use it. Yay.
BEST TELEVISION EVER. A couple of weeks ago, an “exchange” of quips and/or ideals occurred between two forces to be reckoned with. Well, we’d prefer to reckon with only one of the forces, because we truly believe he’s a breath of fresh air, while the other is a
sack of shit windbag. We’re speaking, of course, of the guest appearances of Stephen Colbert (breath of fresh air) on Bill O’Reilly’s ( sack of shit windbag) The Factor, and then O’Reilly’s on The Colbert Report. When all was said and done and TiVo-ed, O’Reilly got totally pwn3d. Naturally, we have no idea what happens when someone gets “pwn3d”, but we think it’s bad, and we’re quite sure it applies to O’Reilly.
IN THIS CORNER, Steven Colbert on The Factor:
IN THIS CORNER: O’Reilly’s weak attempt to but barbs with Colbert.
WE laughed, we cried, we renewed our cable subscription to ensure we’d never miss an episode of the Colbert Report for as long as Stephen’s on the air. By the way, along with the sheer elegance of Colbert’s zingers (for instance his remark that O’Reilly has no idea what it’s like to be victimized by a sex offender. Or the book with a 30% off tag covering O’Reilly’s face. Or that picture of O’Reilly dressed as an “undercover secular progressive”) — we were on the floor in stitches over the sheer inanity of O’Reilly’s responses (not to mention his utter cluelessness as to what was happening). Surely that’s what it means to get “pwn3d”, Shirley. That said, the following week Colbert very nearly pwn3d HIMSELF, which was, needless to say, hilarious — and by “hilarious”, we mean check out that link when you get a chance, because it is HILARIOUS.
ALSO, at the end of the program, Colbert showed the audience a microwave oven he said he’d swiped from The Factor’s green room. Apparently… that was true. Friday morning, O’Reilly called in to FOX News show (while they were on air) to complain about Colbert’s shenanigans. Okay, we never watch that show, so maybe he was laughing about the aforementioned shenanigans, but, either way, COLBERT STOLE A MICROWAVE OVEN in order to display it on his own set. That sound you just heard was the crushing of O’Reilly’s fragile ego, after gettin’ pwn3d three times in a row. Oh snap.
FINALLY, not related to Colbert, trash, stolen microwaves, puke or anything else we’ve discussed thus far, we have a question, in the form of a … er… question. What do you think we should be calling DIESEL’S regular Tuesday features? We’re thinking Diesel’s Reel to Reel, or Diesel Gets Reel, or Diesel is Reely Funny, or Diesel Will be up a Reel Shit Creek if He Fails to do a Post for Us Tomorrow. Thoughts and/or suggestions will be appreciated. Reely.
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