Central Snark

The Visit by Snuppy
Friday, 30 March 2007, 11:00am
Filed under: friends, Teh Penguin

penguin with luggageIT started the way most week long visits do, with an e-mail (“Hey, guess what? I’m coming to see you!”), a phone call (“You’re coming to see us? Yippeeeee!”), a panic (“Holy crap, she’s coming to see us, our house is a mess, we don’t have any food, and, uh, we still need to lose 10 pounds!”) , a call to the cleaning lady (“You want HOW much to clean out that room that hasn’t been touched in over 3 years? Oh Not-Hazel, we thought you were our friend.”), and a trip to the grocery store (“Must stock up on chocolate.”) 

In addition to the above, the pending (and subsequent) visit required: 1. a hotel reservation (“Once they meet her, there’s no way our horndog sons will give her privacy.”), 2. a flurry of e-mails (“NBFF! Guess who’s coming to the East coast!”), 3. a complicated set of arrangements covering the span of 6 days (New Slipcovers? Check. New houseplants? Check. Ample Chocolate? Check. Carpets Cleaned? Ack!), 4. several full tanks of gas (logging over 900 miles, and counting), 5. paint remover (oh, those pesky Blue Men), and 6. gum. Naturally, Clean sheets were helpful, clean floors secondary, clean toilets essential, in lieu of aforementioned “carpet cleaning”, spot remover for the mess the poor sick kitty made before being carted off to the Vet mandatory, and dirty windows ignored, because, hey, it’s winter.

Finally, the day before her arrival. Time for review of plan and/or tweaking:

“We’ll pick her up at the airport then whisk her off to the hotel, because staying with us might get tricky, what with the 2 large and/or horny boys, the 3 large and/or noisy dogs and a guest room still filled with Christmas leftovers (damn that Not-Hazel, anyway).”

“But wait. What about all that snow?”

“Snow? It’s 72 degrees.”

“Yeah, well, tomorrow it won’t be. The roads will be icy, the drive treacherous and the hour, late.”


Calling the car company was easy. Paying for the 5 hours charged to pick up one tiny penguin might not be, but what the hell, at least we didn’t have to schlep out to the airport on those treacherous, icy roads.

opusHmmm. If we continue to share aspects of TEH PENGUIN’S visit in this fashion, we’ll never get done. Heck, we’ll probably still be writing while you’re reading, and that won’t be good for anyone. We can type fast, but who knows if we can type as fast as you can read. Are you willing to find out? Neither are we — so let’s speed things up, shall we? Don’t look now, but we’re about to hit the fast forward button. Try to keep up, we can’t promise you’ll get a chance to see this post again as a summer re-run.

FRIDAY, 16 March (9:43 pm): Phone rings, she’s here. Woohoo! She’s safe. Stuck on the plane, watching a British Airway Jet get de-iced. Look for the driver after you get out of customs. Call us from the hotel. See you tomorrow.

SATURDAY, 17 March (12:13 pm): BOBO and SNUPPY are late. Sorry. What can we say? Mad-crazy kids/dogs/snow in driveway. Ready to go? Yeah. Want coffee? Yeah. Ready to try Starbucks? Yeah? Good. Drink up, time to meet LAMPSHA, who’s on her way after picking up STILETTO (what a doll, just flew in, were her arms tired). Hi Stiletto. Hi Lampsha. Eat? Yeah. Good food? Yeah. Lots of laughs? Oh yeah. Ready to say goodbye/go to hotel/get sleep? Yeah, yeah, and yeah. See you both tomorrow.

SUNDAY, 18 March (2:00 pm): Meet Lampsha AND Scissorhands (great guy). Blue Man Group? Yeah. Good show? Yeah, funny, too. Take pictures of Monika and tall Blue Man. Paint in her hair. Hahaha. Bye Lampsha/Scissors! Take Stiletto and Penguin for drive through Greenwich “countryside” in order to scope out un-freaking-believable homes belonging to people with more money than everyone in all three of our families put together? Yeah. Mexican takeout? Yeah. Muy bueno? Sí sí. Back to hotel? Yawn. See ya mañana.

MONDAY 19 March (10:04 am): Pick up girls at hotel. Force car into non-spacious parking space at Starbucks. Drive like maniac to airport. Right Road? Lost. Lost? Lost. Find airport. Throw Stiletto out of moving car. She’s lovely, someone will dust her off and/or pick up her bag. Hi Lampsha. New Jersey? Yeah? Yeah. 4 1/2 hour car ride over bridges and/or through tunnels. Smiling cop pulls up to car, checks out teh Penguin. You Michelle? No? Too bad. MO’A? Yeah, baby! Art? Amazing. Food? Spectacular. Mo’a? Beyond delightful. Love her, staying late. Gotta go, long drive. Drop you off in Queens, Lampsha? Yeah. Lost? D’oh! Home late?? Oh yeah. Nighty night. See ya tomorrow.

TUESDAY 20 March (11:03 am): Train? Starbucks. Drive in to Manhattan, instead? Okie dokie. Hook up with Lampsha at Grand Central Station, take Subway to Lower Manhattan. CALL HIM AL? Hell Yeah! Trinity Church? Wow! Mrs. Al/Doug’s wife waiting to meet us at apartment? Awesome and Very Awesome! Food? Yummy. Rest of tour? Fab. U. Lous. AWESOME. Bye Al, we’ll call. Drive back/drop off. Nighty night, sleep tight. See ya tomorrow.

WEDNESDAY 21 March (10:51 am): Hey, do we need Starbucks? Why yes, yes we do. Larry take our picture. Larry, let go of teh Penguin. Larry, stop running after our car, we’re late. Drive to Manhattan. Get lost, again. Wait for sons to arrive. Hi guys. Hope you all enjoy Lion King. Snuppy left out in the cold? Yeah. Al? Yes? Coffee/cheesecake? Yeah (and yum). Show’s over, was it good? Fantastic. Time to go home? Uh-huh. More Mexican food? Sí sí señora. Back to hotel, get some sleep. Hasta mañana.

THURSDAY 22 March (9:23 am): Must. Have. Starbucks. Long drive to Massachusetts. Meet THE AMOEBA? Yeah. Nice/funny/scary-smart marine biologist? Indubitably. Good food? Delectable. Chit? Chat. Time to go back. Aloha! Good luck in Hawai’i, dude! Long drive back to Connecticut. Too tired for shopping? No. 8:03 pm, tired now? Yes. Hotel? Yes. 5 am pick up? Yes and yikes! Good night. See you tomorrow. Early.

FRIDAY 23 March (4:59 am): Starbucks? Too early. Damn. Long drive to airport? Yeah. Good ride to airport? Yeah. Excited that teh Penguin will soon be meeting WILLIE, KYAHGIRL, and, if she’s lucky, SQUARE-ISH GIRL? Absolutely. Jealous? A little. Sad to say goodbye? Devastated. Long drive back to Connecticut? Oh… yeah.

NATURALLY, there’s a lot more interesting/entertaining stuff we could share about the visit, but our fingers are tired, and we know your attention spans are short, at best. teh penguinIf you’re desperate to read more about the Tour de Penguin, you can do so HERE (thanks to Lampsha), as well as HERE and HERE (thanks to teh Penguin). As for us? Well, don’t look now, but we get to spend one more day with our favorite Icelandic beauty on Tuesday, and last time we looked, that dining room carpet won’t be cleaning itself. Waiting for the last possible minute to do it ourselves? Well duh.



14 Comments so far
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yeah yeah. long post. imagine how much longer it would have been, had i bothered to go into any actual details about Monika’s visit? pages and pages… you’d have been here all day, and well into the night!

that said, a good time was had by all (or so i’d like to believe). that little penguin is just as sweet/lovely/funny/endearing as you all imagined, as are all the folks we were lucky enough to encounter along the way! let’s hope the “folks” on the WEST COAST come away from their time with Monika smiling as much as everyone here did and/or still is! (my 2 sons are totally smitten, but that’s another post for another day. actually, that’s a post i may never write — if either boy have anything to say about the matter) 😉 xoxo

Comment by One Hot Puppy

I’m exhausted and I didn’t even do most of that stuff…ah memories…excellent reader’s digest version!

Comment by BoBo

what a wonderous adventure you’ve all had! How marvelous to actually get to meet Teh Penguin! Lucky you!

So glad you all enjjoyed each other and had fun! Hope Monika enjoyed her fab stay in NY!!

D 🙂

Comment by FelineFrisky

This will also explain the lateness of your posts. It’s hard to type with your fingers clamped shut as if they are gripping a steering wheel. I mean 5,000 miles in 4 days is a lot! You handled it a like a pro, even my expert co-piloting – Right on Jackson!!
The Penguin tour was indeed like meeting up with old friends and so glad that Sar made her way up. Both are real treasures.

Oh and speaking of not Hazel – would she come to Queens?


Comment by LAMPSHA

Oh and ditto on the treasures all around – meeting up with everyone was indeed beyond words.

Comment by LAMPSHA


I gotta go take a nap.

Comment by al

I..am..huffing…and…puffing. Give an old geezer a break. 😛 I can’t read that fast. 😆

Sounds like a fantastic tour of the countryside that looks just like Iceland. Well, without all the trees, and mansions and traffic. At least you had snow. 🙄

Glad you all were able to meet and cram fun into your visit Monika, even if the boys were a little happy to see you. 😳

Have a great weekend on the Left Coast, and a safe flight back home next week. 😯

Comment by Brian

BoBo: and yet, you were there with us in spirit, the WHOLE TIME! (just glad you were around for some of the fun) xox

FF: teh Penguin is a delight — and we had a wonderful time! i’m just hoping she did, too! 🙂 xox

Lampsha: i’m thinking “lateness” may be my new middle name. oy. as for this post? i’m thinkin’ i did NOT do justice to your participation/culpability throughout the week. without you, dear NBFF, we would have been MORE lost, had LESS fun, and, uh, a lot of other stuff i’m too tired/lazy to type out at the moment. too bad those folks you work for expect you to show up in order to get that paycheck — we wanted/needed you with us EVERY DAY! xox

Al: did i mention how FANTASTIC your lovely wife/amazing apartment/fabulous meal/your unbelievable tour/your charming company (especially the “rescue” on Wednesday) was? were? whatever… seriously — WE HAD SO MUCH FUN WITH YOU! rest up, she may be back before any of us know it (besides, we’re now booking tours… if you’re nice, we might even cut you in on the action!) xox

Brian: NOW you know how I feel! ’twas a whirlwind tour, to say the least. but it was fun, and a real treat to spend so much quality time with Monika — as well as meet up with a few other wonderful blogger buds. i’m with you in hoping her time on the Left Coast is fun/fabulous and/or safe! 🙂 xox

Comment by snuppy

Soooooo jealous
Sar, and Monika, G, Al, O’C, Neva, Scissors, Bobo AND Al??
Moa as well, wow.
Just wow
AND blue paint.
Some folks have all the luck.

Comment by logo™

Still in Barcelona… getting ready to head back soon… well, everyone’s asleep except for me so “soon” is relative I am afraid!

And though I delight in the fabulous and wondrous adventures that were had, WOE IS ME DAMMIT, for being stuck in *(^*&^^%&^$&^% Spain hanging out with ^^&*^*^&* mobsters and missing out on Connecticut/NY/NJ adventures! Some Penguins/Puppies/Lampshades/Kitten-heel-wearing-artists/Downtowners/Banjoeys/Horny-young-men/Stiletto-heels have all the DAMN LUCK!



Comment by Catty Yummy Mummy

logo™: i have NO DOUBT in my mind that Monika would have made it up your way, if she’d had more time — your ears should have been ringing a bit, my friend, because you were practically “sitting” at that restaurant with us (Sar, Monika, G, Joel, & me), as we talked about a few of the other folks we ALL hope to meet some day (i know that sounds like i’m sucking up, but i swear it’s true!) xox

CYM: ah, mi amiga… speaking of ringing ears! yours should have been, as well! especially during the time we spent at Mo’a’s (or LoveMo’a, as you so fondly refer to our beautiful-and-oh-so-artistically-gifted friend!) SOON you will be in these here United States and you will be able to participate in any and all gatherings, if i have to buy you the plane ticket (in order to get you to the East Coast) myself! besos — and safe driving from that fabulous city you and the family just visited! xox

Comment by snuppy

Did I do that to you.

*puts head in already decently filled toilet bowl*

Some people should not be allowed to be inflicted on others!
That being said, boy am I glad I inflicted myself upon you guys. A great journey was had and tsill is…there are a good three days to go and no point in calming down now!
I can’t wait to see you AGAIN!!!


Comment by Penguin


Comment by Penguin

Penguin: we CAN’T WAIT for you to get back, silly girl! oh, Starbuck Larry says “hi” — tho’ he won’t be around when you get back, he hopes you get to enjoy at least one more grande-soy-with-whip-mocha before you head back to Iceland. that Larry. to say he was smitten would be an understatement! i’m just hoping we can cram a few more fun activities in to the 23 hours we’ll have once you get back here. you didn’t plan to sleep, did you?

we. WILL. have. Starbucks. i promise! 😉 xoxo

Comment by snuppy

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