Central Snark


How Do We Rate? by Snuppy
Thursday, 14 June 2007, 8:41am
Filed under: funny...

waiting and wondering. get it? one girl is waiting, the other is wondering. hahaha.AH yes, how do we rate? That’s the question burning in our fragile little minds right now, and, with luck, we’ll have our answer by tomorrow. That is to say, we will if DIESEL actually gets back to his “regularly scheduled blogging” by then. Still, knowing we’ve been under the bloggy microscope for the past couple of weeks has had us somewhat freaked out.

OKAY, that’s a lie from the pits of hell. Truth be told, we don’t give a rat’s ass what people think about us. Or maybe we do give a rat’s ass, but we’re just too stupid to know who we should give it to. Don’t ask us to explain what the hell that means, chances are we’d only make up some ridiculous answer that would piss you off and/or further damage our chances for a good review in the future. Now where were we before you interrupted us with your tawdry talk of rat’s asses? Oh yeah, ratings. Boy, you could hear a pin drop in our office when we found out our “Humor-blogs.com review” number was up last week. A grenade pin, that is, and wowie, you should have heard us yell “duck” just before we ran for cover. HAHAHA. If you knew us better, that line would totally crack you up. Ever see us do an impersonation of a duck? It’s not pretty, but it’s a lot better than watching us hit our head on a low beam (which is why we “duck” in the first place. ba-dump-bump). But we digress…

SO… what do you think? Will we wind up with a high score? Or will someone do a hatchet job on us, in order to cut us down in our bloggy prime? Not wanting to wait and/or be surprised by any potentially “unkind” remarks, we’ve decided to potentially soften the blow with a few choice words of our own. Below is a sample of the potential comments we anticipate reading, once the votes are tallied and the potential reviews are picked apart and/or reassembled for our potential perusal:

1. I laughed out… side.

2. THIS is a blog.

3. Who are “we”? And what are “we” doing here?

4. Nothing I like more than a good laugh. Most of the stuff on this blog gave me gas.

5. Qui Γͺtes-vous essayant au gosse?

6. This IS a blog.

7. I came, I read, I left. I washed my hands with Drano.

8. Too bad DJ LAMPSHA’S Saturday Spins can’t happen EVERY day, because I have a lot of space to fill on my iPod.

9. I’m very confused. And medication doesn’t help. I have weird dreams about monkey knife fights, too, but maybe I should discuss those things with my therapist and/or psychic.

10. I love “TEH PENGUIN“, even if she can’t sepll.

11. This is a BLOG?

12. …and the punchline was “diesel fitter”. Yeah, I didn’t get it, either.

13. NOT a blog, but a terrifying journey through a black hole in the Blogosphere. With time off on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Weekends for good behavior and/or better reading.

14. Once I finish reviewing this blog, I plan to poke myself in the eye with a sharp stick.

15. I like pie.

BY the way, we’ve dubbed that picture at the top of the page “waiting and wondering”. flat out tiredGet it? One girl is “waiting” and the other one is “wondering” what the hell she’s waiting for. Hahahahahaha. In our head, that’s just plain funny. But then, we didn’t get much sleep last night, which hopefully explains our silly state of mind and/or this post.

~snuppy

Critics agree: pie is good, and everyone’s a comedian at Humor-blogs.com.

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24 Comments so far
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in all honesty, NONE of us are terribly concerned about our Humor-blogs.com “rating”. that said, i’m not sure the other “girls” knew we were getting, um, scrutinized. fortunately, we had some grand posts last week — thanks in no SMALL part to CRUMMY JOEL, THE DRIVE-BY BLOGGER, TEH PENGUIN (but of course!) and DJ LAMPSHA’S amazing spin over the weekend. i figure we’re bound to come out smelling like a water squirtin’ boutoniere.

and, of course, there’ll be hell to pay if we don’t. πŸ˜‰

Comment by One Hot Puppy

It’s especially nice that some of your guest bloggers are also reviewers of your site…that’s gotta help at least a little bit πŸ˜‰

Comment by CrummyJoel

one can only hope. actually, i’m thinkin’ that works out nicely for some of you, too! πŸ˜‰

Mornin’, CrummyJoel, by the way! and thanks again for that great post YOU did Tuesday — that was a great one, my friend. in fact, we’re still gettin’ “hits” on it. well done!! πŸ™‚ xox

Comment by snuppy

Wouldn’t worry about the popular vote just the electoral college.

Comment by BoBo

Seplling is soooo operrated.
So it typing, I mean, really!
:p
I love me some snark!

Comment by logoβ„’

I’ll still come back… even if the results tell me I’m crazy.

Comment by Jeff

Waiting and Wondering – now see that’s just brilliant to me – hahahaaha! Of course, I’m not reviewing so, my opinion matters not. No matter, The Snark is numero uno as far as I’m concerned and Bobo’s right – it’s the electoral college we worry about.

Did you send the reviewers your cookies ahead of time? Nothing inappropriate, just so they’d have something to eat while reviewing…

Comment by Lampsha

Not saying the results won’t be great but just in case, remember this:

1) People hated the pilot for “Friends.”
2) “Arrested Development” was cancelled due to the stupidity of t.v. viewers.
3) ditto “Dead Like Me.”

You guys don’t need no stinking public endorsment…just saying.

Comment by BoBo

You guys are great. You make me pee in my pants. I’m only two.

(Bobo’s right. Just the same, gotta go vote.)

Comment by al

Come on now, you can’t be serious…You know your rating will be one of the best. You guys rock! I didn’t get any cookies, though. So, what is that diesel fitter thing all about? I just had to ask, the curiosity is killing me.

Comment by Theresa

BoBo: if we have any reviewers in Florida and/or Ohio, i’m screwed. d’oh! πŸ˜‰ xox

logoβ„’: operrated? hahaha! taht’ shilarious! πŸ™‚ xox

Jeff: you think you need our “results” to confirm that? hang on to that harmonica, man, pretty sure you’re gonna need it! (i hear they come in handy in those padded cells). πŸ˜‰ xox

Lampsha: and THAT’S why you and i are NBFFs! as for the “ratings”? i hate to break it to ya, girlfriend, but you and i are in this thing together (along with Teh Penguin, Catty Yummy Mummy, and, of course, that Diesel). πŸ™„ xox

BoBo: i’d feel better if shows like “Yes, Dear” and/or “Will and Grace” managed to stay on the air for so stinkin’ long. maybe we DON’T know what “funny” is. or maybe those other folks are just stupid “differently” amused. πŸ˜• xox

Al: hey bub, if YOU were supposed to review this blog, and haven’t yet, you’re too stinkin’ late. aieeeeee! oh well, break out the Depends… i plan to have another “hilarious” post sometime in the very near future. πŸ™‚ xox

Theresa: were i not on a diet, i would SO have baked cookies for anyone and/or everyone. damn me and that 4 pounds i still need to lose. bet we were thisclose to a really HIGH rating, too. sigh. πŸ˜‰ xox

PS — dear-oh-dearest Penguin, wherever you are!! you DO know we’re teasing about teh sepllings, don’t you??? πŸ˜‰

Comment by snuppy

You got a 63. πŸ™‚

The review score is already posted, we just haven’t gotten the actual review details and fancy write-up on the review blog.

I found this out when I noticed my site jumped from #38 to #15 last night.

Nice job on the score! πŸ™‚

Comment by Chris C.

Pie IS good!

Comment by Nessa

The Snark IS better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, I always say
that’s why
I read everyday!

Comment by Claire

Snuppy, I’m not a reviewer — and I hadn’t visited “Humor Blogs” at all before I read about it in this particular post. I guess I “voted” by clicking over there from here?

Humor Blogs is a funny site, and the listed blogs are all very humorous.

But this place feels more like home.

Anyhow, that’s my vote.

Comment by al

Um. Huh?

Comment by Doug

Chris: cool. or crap. i mean, 63? is that good? sounds so…average. oh well… at least we have our health, and that’s something. πŸ˜‰ xox

Nessa: i’m thinkin’ boysenberry is mighty fine, this time of year! πŸ™‚ xox

Claire: at least we’ve got that goin’ for us. the “better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick”, that is, not the “you read everyday”… because we loooooove having you here every day! xox

Al: i’m just giving you a little shit. so, you’ve been mocking “humor blogs” all this time, but never stopped over there to see what it was?? hahahahaha! now THAT’S funny! πŸ™‚

Doug: lemme see if i can sepll it out for ya…
THE. SNARK. IS. BEING. RATED. BY. SOME. “MEMBERS”. FROM. DIESEL’S. OTHER. SITE. PEOPLE. HAVE. BEEN JUDGING. US…. for our “ability” to craft a “humor-blogs.com-worthy” blog, no less. and our nerves are frayed. not unlike my fingernails, teh other day, when i was sick. πŸ˜‰ xox

Comment by snuppy

Unless the future reviews of the rest of the sites are much higher in score, 63 is right at the top of the heap. πŸ™‚

Comment by Chris C.

Hey, did you hack into my review database, snuppy? Because these comments look eerily familiar.

Except it’s “This is A blog.”

Chris, you lovable bastard, you weren’t supposed to notice that. Yes, the final score was 63, which is pretty decent. And Crummy Joel is the only snarkster who dared review the Snark, so having an in with the reviewers didn’t help much. πŸ™‚

Comment by Diesel

Chris: heck — we’ll be honored to score anything higher than, say, 16. that said… did i NOT notice your score was a 65?? you can thank me for pushing you ahead of us — flowers are nice, but i’ll take jewelry and/or cash, as well. that said, i gave you high scores because i do think you’re one talented writer! πŸ™‚ xox

Diesel: d’oh! i knew i emphasized the wrong word. CrummyJoel, eh? hmmmm…. i feel a “Dear CrummyJoel” letter coming on — hope he doesn’t mind being the target of his own whine mail. πŸ˜‰

welcome back, by the way — we missed you! xox

Comment by snuppy

Diesel- hehe. That’s Mr lovable bastard to you! πŸ™‚

Snuppy- Thank you very much for the compliments, being called a talented writer means a lot to me.

And per our agreement, the compliments were included free of charge right? I don’t see it in the paperwork on my end.

Comment by Chris C.

Congratulations on your ratings being up, and good luck with all the rat’s asses out there in the future.

Comment by weirsdo

Thanks for that, dear friend. Only a real friend can point out your mistake and get away with it πŸ™‚

I always thought I only type wrong in comment sections, not in my posts. *starts to worry a little bit and then gets distracted by some chocolate next to her*

Comment by Penguin

Chris: that one’s a gimme. you can make it up to me, next time around. πŸ˜‰ xox

Weirsdo: yeah, those rat’s asses can be a real problem. heh heh. πŸ™‚ xox

Penguin: truth be told you misspell words WAY less frequently than I do! (not sure that’s saying much). i ADORE your spellings almost as much as i adore your posts and your comments… and that’s a lot, but STILL only a fraction of how much i adore YOU!! πŸ™‚ xoxo

Comment by snuppy




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