Central Snark


No Sex, Ed. by Snuppy
Friday, 27 July 2007, 8:23am
Filed under: Sex, Ed?

NO sex, anyone. That’s right, zip, zero, nada. What? After yesterday’s Big Book Launching Bonanaramananza, we’re just not in the mood to “do” anything. Chalk it up to a headache. Blame it on the bossa nova. Discuss it amongst yourselves and/or with your mothers-in-law. Just don’t bother us with your prodding, because trust us, there’ll be no discussions around here about anything even remotely related to “gettin’ lucky”. Not today.

SO stop your pouting, and get over yourselves. Think about something else for a minute or 10, okay? We find reading helps ease the tension of not “getting” what we want, perhaps that might work for you, as well. Unfortunately, it’s highly doubtful purchasing and/or reading Diesel’s “Antisocial Commentary” will do anything to enhance relaxation, let alone stimulate one’s sagging libido. Altho’, now that we think of it, a quick read could force us to remove our panties. Sadly, we’d probably be doing it because they were soaked in all that pee we were unable to hold in from laughing so much. Or not. Because, let’s face it, no matter how lacy they are, pee-soaked panties are just plain disgusting.

mattress police

OKAY, you found us out. In truth, this is just another shameless plug for DIESEL’S book, in hopes he’ll be so freakin’ happy he’ll agree to supply us with a few more Snarky posts before running off to join the ranks of Russo, Chabon, Walker, Updike, Eugenides, and/or Barry* — which is something we expect to happen the instant he sells a few copies of his book and becomes rich, famous, and/or embroiled in a scandal of some sort. Hopefully not one involving the likes of Lindsay Lohan or Britney Spears, because, let’s face it, that would be disgusting.

*That’s right, we’re not as stupid as we look. Or, maybe we are, but at least we’ve purchased a few books written by Pulitzer prize-winning authors, in the hopes our friends will think we’re well-read, should they ever elect to stop by and peruse our meager-yet-impressively stocked bookcase.

~snuppy

Will you pee your pants when reading Humor-blogs.com? Depends.

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7 Comments so far
Leave a comment

i know this isn’t Diesel’s “dream” book launching post, either, but guess what? i don’t care. well, i do, but not enough to A) lose sleep B) do another post and/or C) buy a few more copies of his book, which, at $9.95 really is a GREAT DEAL, especially since the pre-ordered copies will be autographed! not by Diesel, mind you, but that’s beside the point. the point, which was written FOR me BY Diesel 2 days ago, is that, um, he’s taking orders for his book, and he hopes more than Lampsha, me, and his mom will buy one. πŸ˜‰

Comment by One Hot Puppy

If the book is as funny as this shameless plug, then it has got to be a funny book!

Comment by Pavel

there’s a book?

Comment by Penguin

Bought mine. πŸ™‚

Have a great weekend and say hi to teh Penguin. πŸ˜‰

Comment by Brian

We still can’t underestimate the “book as table leg level” angle.

Hope your headache clears up πŸ˜‰

Comment by LAMPSHA

As long as it isn’t a plagiarism scandal involving Lindsay Lohan, I think I can weather it.

Comment by Diesel

@snuppy: please don’t ever say ‘pee-soaked panties’ ever again. k thx.

@Diesel: I just pre-ordered my ankle bracelet along with your book.

@Pavel: Preorder the book, you will love it. Not the preorder process, that’s a given but rather the actual book.

Comment by Chris C




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