Central Snark

LIFE ever so fragile… by Snuppy
Wednesday, 17 October 2007, 7:29am
Filed under: friends, Teh Penguin



I envy not in any moods
The captive void of noble rage,
The linnet born within the cage,
That never knew the summer woods:

I envy not the beast that takes
His license in the field of time,
Unfetter’d by the sense of crime,
To whom a conscience never wakes;

Nor, what may count itself as blest,
The heart that never plighted troth
But stagnates in the weeds of sloth;
Nor any want-begotten rest.

I hold it true, whate’er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
‘Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

-Alfred Lord Tennyson-

This poem, and particularly this tiny section of it, has helped me through many a difficult trial. Every one of us has to deal with sadnesses and loses at one time or another.

In the wake of loss, we are haunted by things we might never understand. And would answers provide solace in the end? What we do have is memories of tenderness. There is comfort in the knowledge that not even shadows can extinguish the glow of warmth.  May that feeling make you breathe, hold you close, and give you peace whenever you experience trying times.

~Penguin out!

NOTE from Lampsha:  Those are among some of the most beautiful words ever written, Penguin.  They are indeed.  I just wanted to update everyone that Neva’s brother-in-law passed away Monday evening.  This is her dear dear sister Terri’s husband.  He has been a very special part of their family for many years and it is of course, a deep and very sad loss to them.  She will be away from TheSnark for a spell but will never be far from our hearts.  Love and good thoughts to her family. 


24 Comments so far
Leave a comment

OK guys, since it is not my place to splatter sadness-related news of others all over the net, I just wanted to send some warm and loving thoughts to people who might need it, without stepping on toes.

I would also like to use this opportunity to mention to everyone I love, that I am always just a phonecall away; if soemone is in desperate need of a Penguin joke, Iceland’s frosty temperature or wants to count the colors in my kitchen with me.

Comment by Penguin

Easier said than done, but if you don’t try to find some meaning in it all, life can be pretty unbearable at times. I guess you have to make the most of what you have while you have it, and remember the good things when they are gone. I don’t know who you wrote this for, but I send out good vibes to whoever it is.

Comment by Theresa

Troubles come in three is the old saying. Who’s in the hospital now??? Oh jeez.

But I think the peom was lovely. Happiness and warmth to all in Snarkland. 🙂

Comment by IDiveAtNight

Thank you, kind and gentle penguin. I wasn’t sure what to satirize this morning. Now I have a pretty good idea. That said, a thousand kindnesses to you and whoever you reassure.

Comment by Walela

Theresa, exactly. It is not easy…that’s why I thought different perspectives might at least show that people care, and you can’t really beat that!

Morgan, bad tidings do come in threes, don’t they? Thank you for that giant hug!

Comment by Penguin

whoops… snuck by me there, Lela! Don’t worry though, I have utter faith in your ability to find the week spot in humanity, even if YOU are the last person on earth 🙂

Comment by Penguin

Nice lunge, penguin! I’m actually flattered.

Comment by Walela

Again, lovely words Penguin. Sadness and loss, that difficult part of life, can be softened and withstood with the love and support of others. May it be so for Terri.

Much love to you Neva. XOX

Comment by Lampsha

walela, I know you would be…little matyr that you are most innate.

lampy, thanks for adding these words, I wasn’t sure I was at liberty to divouge that information. Still I wanted to write a post to give Neva a hug, Terri my love and Bill a safe journey without regrets. Because from everything that I can gather…love did surround all three of them.

Comment by Penguin

Neva, I am so sorry to hear what happened. I’m sending a hug and love, and my most sincere condolences to Terri.

Comment by Theresa

Death is the starlit strip between the companionship of yesterday and the reunion of tomorrow.
– on monument erected to Mark Twain & Ossip Gabrilowitsch

I am without words of my own, as when I am confronted with death these days I have a profound loss of understanding. My deep sorrow and condolences to Neva, her sister Terri and Family at the loss of Terri’s husband. Lampsha and Minka – your words are comforting.

Comment by Terry

Theresa, isn’t it strange…although we have never met Terri or Bill, since we all know and love Neva…it somehow transcends to those close to her. I hope they feel hugged!

terry, thank you…it is hard to find words without being inappropriate. I hope we struck thr right balance!

Comment by Penguin

And with that disclosure made, heartfelt sympathies to Snuppy and Dr. Terri.

Comment by Walela

Well there is nothing I can add, except of course my own cyber-sympathies. Penguin and Lampsha have done an excellent job of relating the proper condolences which we all feel. Neva, may your family find peace and comfort somehow, someway.

Comment by claire

I heard of this unfortunate and horrible loss yesterday… horrible because I was fortunate enough to have heard a lot about Terri and Bill, of Bill’s amazing strength throughout the years in battling his cancer and the grace in which he did so and I had the honor to hear of Terri’s tireless and awe-inspiring efforts to keep the love of her life as well cared for and catered to as possible… all as related to me by our very dear, and very much missed, Neva… and so the loss of such a man is a great one indeed and one that no amount of words can do it justice…

Terri, Neva, Joel, Matt & Andy… my heart goes out to you all and I feel such pain at Bill’s loss, I who never had the pleasure to meet him, that I cannot even begin to fathom what such a loss of such a wonderful and amazing soul that you were all fortunate enough to know and love must mean to you.

I wish the news was better… I wish there was something I could do (and if there ever is you know where to find me)… but most of all I wish you all much peace and gentle healing and send you all as much love as I can muster…

Thinking of you..

Comment by Miz BoheMia

And dearest Penguin this was a very beautiful tribute to a wonderful man who touched many of us who simply heard of him and never came in actual contact with him… a fabulous soul indeed to have such an impact and a very beautiful tribute from you to him and to our dear friends Neva and Joel…

As for contributing to your beautiful writing, nothing comes to mind as to what has helped me through loss… my grandfather and elder brother’s passing have been the hardest things to live through as far as loss goes and as I grow older, for some reason, their absence hurts me more and I wish so much I could have them here, vibrant and alive and by my side…

So when I feel down, when I miss them, when I need help, when I feel alone, I like to visualize them vividly there with me… as I go about my business (whether it be my yoga practice, cleaning the kitchen, driving…) I work myself to a point where I feel them there with me, see them in my mind’s eye hanging out with me, eating, sitting, holding me… and we talk. And I ask them questions and I see them answer me and I simply bring them into my space and I make myself believe it was real and that, as simple or stupid as it may be, makes me feel better.

When I was 19 I lost a dear friend called Alfredo, to a car accident. Then I needed help and my coping mechanisms were different and I read an excellent book on loss by Elisabeth Kubler Ross that helped me through.

Once again, thank you for a beautiful post my dear friend… sending you many boho besos and hoping all is well with you..

Comment by Miz BoheMia

My condolences to Neva, Terri, and everyone else whose life was touched by Bill. Here’s hoping he has found peace.

Comment by Diesel

So sorry to hear of this loss. Hugs to Neva, Terri, Joel and the boys.

It always hurts to lose those we love the most and Penguin…this poem is beautiful. It made me cry and I needed to read this this week too.

Comment by littlebluepill

Walela, I think every thought is appreciated.

Claire, thank you…I guess it was a difficult line, because you don’t wanna go overboard.

Miz B, wonderfully written and thank you. I think the thing about this is, that when you know and Love Neva, who does everythign she can for you and God knows, she has done amazing thinsg for me. You can’t help but seize an opportunity to hug her and comfort her, when the chance presents itself. Unlike you, I have never has the experience of a human death very close to me…partly becuase half my family tree is a mystery to me. My grandma died when I was 12, but we lived so far away from her, that I was never involved in it so much…

Diesel, absolutely.

Littlebluepill, I am gla dit gave you comfort *extends a tissue and gives her a hug*

Comment by Penguin

Wow. Quite a couple of weeks for the family. My prayers with them.

Comment by crummyjoel

i wish i had the words to properly convey the gratitude for such an amazing/overwhelming outpouring of love and good wishes. my sister had a moment to peruse the blog (okay, i had to try to make her laugh for a second or two, and showed her the “beauty pageant bugler”) and, in clicking over, she had a chance to read this wonderful post — which brought a smile to her lovely face for a few minutes, before the horror and sadness of this past week came racing back into the forefront of her thoughts. needless to say, she was very touched by the words she found herein.

anyway — such a thoughtful and touching sentiment, Penguin, Lampsha, and all who left comments. more meaningful than i can say — this loss is beyond profound… for my sister, for Bill’s daughter, for us ALL. he was a MOST amazing man, and some day i would be honored to share a few words about his remarkable life.

for now, however, all i can say is thank you. thank you from the bottom of my (especially) fragile little heart. not sure when i’ll be able to make it back — but i’ll try to do so soon. xox

Comment by neva

Neva: I am so sorry for your family’s loss.

Comment by nessa

Neva, I am so sorry. It’s a cliche but people really do live as long as they’re talked about and laughed over.

Comment by pia

Crummy Joel, when life happens it usually brings a tornadoe with it.

Snuppy, breathing in and out, is somethign I like to concentrate on when life is overwhelming! *hugs*

nessa, thank you

pia, I think truer words have never been spoken. I have a few people I laugh and think about and they are very real to me, partly because I know that I am lucky to have had them around in the first place.

Comment by Penguin

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: